Squash Stack Studio

Welcome to day three of this very … eventful championship! I am your host Emil Schnauzertrophy! With me is our lead camerawoman Barbara Brickleburger and the referee for the event, Antoine Bidness. We are broadcasting from the beautiful Salle du Brique. Today we will witness the finale, as the Camelot team representing the CrossPlanar League faces off against Hic et Nunc of the InterChron League. This should be very exciting – I have to say, Barbara, I’m particularly pleased to see two teams at approximately the same level of technology. The disparities we’ve witness the last couple of days have been – well, they’ve been downright deadly!

Wait a minute! I’m getting word now in my headset that there’s been a substantial change in the lineup today. Let’s take a break while I sort this out with the judges. Good timing – here comes our sponsor, Hot Dog on Rollerskates, leading the food vendors! Barbara, I’ll be right back!

Hi, folks! Barbara Brickleburger here! Looks like the audience is in for a real treat! Here comes Kurt Kaczmarek, the original rollerskate hot dog hunk, followed closely by his identical twin brother Kevin, master pizza chef and expert with anything on two wheels.

And who is that in the Hot Dog on Rollerskates mascot costume? It looks like the twins’ little brother Kyle – that’s adorable!

Well, the audience is certainly thrilled to see them – although it looks like a few people brought snacks of their own. Is that a baguette and a bowl of cereal I see? Where did they get turkey legs? That woman in the front row looks like she’s drinking out of an Erlenmeyer flask – and whatever’s in it is glowing! And why does Referee Bidness have a martini? I don’t think that’s regulation!

It doesn’t seem to have hurt the brothers’ revenues; looks like they’re rolling out of here rolling in the dough! Good for them!